I just finished A Grief Observed, by C.S. Lewis. I titled this entry "Poi si torno all’ eterna fontana" because that is the last line of the book, meaning (from Dante) "then she turned back to the eternal fountain." C.S. Lewis is an absolute genius and I learned a lot from reading this, but I also missed a lot of stuff because he is so much above me. One thing I did learn is that I don't know a thing about God, and I really do need to trust him because I don't know how or why he does the things he does. C.S. Lewis, in his great grief, never doubted God, but he did doubt God's character. He battled with the idea of an all powerful and a good god coexisting. This made me terribly confused and angry because, in a sort of guilty way, I count on Lewis to be firm, and to know who God is, and that God is good. But Lewis, with his incredible pain and catholic beliefs of purgatory struggled during that time. That kind of scared me too, I guess: the idea of purgatory. And I wonder, are catholics right? I believe with a full conviction that they are wrong, and I feel like the Bible reveals the truth in the Christian beliefs but then why would a man so smart as Lewis be a Catholic? That scares me, but I know I have to go with the way the Bible speaks to me, and I just can't see the truth in catholicism.
This was really just Lewis' thoughts as they came to him, he captured them on paper but did not organize them too fully so maybe that's another reason this was so difficult to understand. I pray for the amount of love, faith and trust it takes to reach God. Because can doing save you? It is a battle of the heart, not the body's actions.
Hello!
ReplyDeleteI just finished rereading "A grief observed" and found your post when looking up the translation to the last line.
C.S. Lewis has been my favorite author since I was a teen and I'm now going on 55. By the way, Lewis wasn't Catholic; one might say he was 'almost' Catholic, as he was an Anglican.
After spending most of my life as a non-denominational Christian who was anti-Catholic to boot, I converted to the Roman Catholic faith two years ago. How did this occur?
It's simple, really. I finally allowed God to work in my life completely, turning my will over to His will. This eventually led me to His Church.
What we believe and disbelieve really has little to do with what's true.
It's more about our wills. We are usually unwilling to believe something because if we believe it, we might have to change. If we believe it we might have to relinquish control. If we believe it, will might have to actually live it.
Though the Catholic faith is very demanding, requiring (in my case) to change my life considerably, it became so easy when I allowed God's grace to come in.
Years ago, when I gave God complete control of my life, I experienced an invasion of Grace. God wants to invade all of us in this way. It is our free will that either allows this to happen or shuts Him out.
All my life I had shut Him out by believing in Him my way and worshiping Him within my own personal comfort zone.
The trick is to open one's heart and mind and life to His will. He won't force His way into our lives, but He will stand at the door and knock. If we let Him in the front door He will clean up the front hall and living room and will then knock on an inner door. He will continue this from room to room until the whole house is made anew. How many of us only let him into the front room?
We must throw open all the doors!
He has so much in store for those who surrender completely to His grace!
God bless you,
Michael
Most Catholics are works oriented. Read Galatians. It is not what we do it is what Christ does in and thru us if in fact we have the spirit of Christ.
DeleteJust to reinforce the point: CS Lewis was not Catholic and he did not believe in Purgatory.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the translation. Yes, without question C. S. Lewis is way above me. I've read this book before. I underlined and made comments. But when I read it once more this time, it was as if I had never read it.
ReplyDeleteGary
Wow, I'm so amazed someone else felt literally exactly the same way I did not only after reading this book, but about C. S. Lewis, counting on him to always know wassup and feeling so thrown when HE was so thrown. This really made me feel better in its way.
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